Dedragging: Mykel's Come As You Are Session
De-Dragging Portrait Session | Drag Queen Photography | Come As You Are Boudoir | Apollo Fields NYC Portraits
Dedragging: Mykel's Come As You Are Session
She has one rule, well actually She has a full list of rules because She is a boss like that, but the most important one is: “Never take off any drag until you are home and the door is closed. Serve the full fantasy and commit to the gag.”
The night is over and in the car back I am itching to regain control of my normal body functions. Since leaving the house six hours ago, all I've been thinking about is taking off the drag that has deprived me of these basic needs. My feet have lost all feeling in the spiked heel death traps I have fastened to them. I go to take them off and give myself the beginning feelings of freedom from the martyrdom that is drag, but She reminds me, “Bitch, you’ll be fine. No one wants to see a flat-footed drag queen hobbling into her building. Buck up buttercup, we’re almost home.”
After an awkward farewell from my Uber driver, who is clearly going to spend the rest of the night compartmentalizing his sexual desire for She, I grow more and more excited to de drag with every brittle step I take. I am so close to freedom I could cry. The elevator is empty. No one can see me. I go to peel off the wig and free my head from the giant band of torture elastic. “No, no, no, No. What if the sexy neighbor is in the hall? I’m not going to be a bald headed bitch.” She scolds.
The terrifying bounce of the old elevator arriving on my floor reminds me sharply that I’ve had to pee since leaving the house. Being that my penis is taped up my own ass, I have to just forget about all bathroom requirements entirely. On two dead feet and a piercingly full bladder, I full on run/wobble from the elevator down the hall, looking like a drunk freshly birthed giraffe. I unbutton her dress and let it fall to the ground, while savagely ripping off her thumb and index finger nails with my teeth.
“What are you...?” Ignoring her completely I dump out the contents of her purse, and squat like a monkey to frantically get the keys. Out of the corner of my eye I see that hot neighbor coming out of his apartment. “I fucking told you! Oh my God! Get inside right now!” I unlock the door and lunge into the entry hall while incomprehensibly stammering ‘great to see you, have a good night’.
Immediately I’m dodging my dog Tux, who has undoubtedly been sitting in the same spot since I left, plotting his triumphant fanfare of love and adoration upon my return. I leap over him and make it to the bathroom just in time to peel down five layers of Capezio tights, releasing my foam butt pads like coiled snakes in a can.
The downright emotional release that comes from ripping off the duct tape and allowing my penis to emerge into an oxygen filled environment is life changing to say the least. Also the terrifying sight of it slowly accordioning out from the cave of my pelvis is something directly from a sci-fi horror movie. “There ya go buddy! Sweet release.” She says with kindness and understanding.
There I am, suddenly a man in a beautiful wig and makeup, tights rolled down to my calves, a nude lace bra, adorned in diamonds and jewels, and fully bedazzled plastic nails on. There is nothing more powerful than straddling a toilet and peeing in six inch heels. I catch a glimpse of me, her, us in the mirror and can’t help but feel proud. “ I love being gay.”
I waddle into my bedroom while avoiding the land mines of toys, ropes, and balls lovingly set out by my dog. I pry off my heels and try to set my feet flat on the ground, but anyone who has spent any significant amount of time in heels knows that your feet are going to be frozen in place like Barbie’s plastic arches for the next few hours. “Also, good luck with your lower back pain for the rest of the week darling. You’re fucked.” She’s right. I’m fucked.
Whoever invented underwire should be burned at the stake. “For. Real. Though. Henny.” She says while taking the first deep breath of the night. The alarmingly red indent around my torso after taking off her bra is a mere battle scar. I wear it with begrudging pride. Now comes the most painful part of de-dragging, taking off the nails. There is no kind way to tear off your own cuticles. You have to find your numb happy place and just bite those claws off and spit them victoriously across the room. “Oh shit, look out, he’s butch all of a sudden.”
I stand back from the mirror, and take a good last look while blood and oxygen begin to freely flow through my body again. Even though I’m a naked man standing there, I still see the woman I made looking back at me. It’s strange to say the words “woman I made”, because in reality She is shaping me. She gives me the power to see society see me, and I am strengthened every time She takes over. She is softer in her inflections and gestures, yet She requires more physical and emotional strength that I just don’t have when I’m a man. She’s a brave boss.
We stare at each other for minute. The corner of her lip smirks, and the sassy sultry sound of her voice says, “Bitch, you look stunning.” We grab the wig, and for a moment the world is in slow motion. She gives me a final wink, and I snatch it off my head. She’s gone for now. She was fabulous tonight.
Talent: Mykel Vaughn
Photography: Apollo Fields
Location: The Denizen Co.
Liberty House Wedding Photography in Jersey City
Apollo Fields | Jersey City Wedding Photographers | New Jersey Wedding Photography | Winter Wedding in New Jersey | Liberty House Weddings | Liberty House Wedding Photographer | Liberty State Park Wedding Photos | Liberty State Park Engagement Photography
Jane & James
As Heather and I drove through Staten Island en route to Bayonne, NJ, for our last wedding of the year, all I could think about was pizza. To be fair, I’m one of those people who can have pizza once a day and not get sick of it. I had already researched where we would stop in Staten Island on our way back (Denino’s); a choice that was further supported by the groom, James. At the end of the day, Jane and James invited us to dine with their guests and the entire day tied a beautiful bow upon our crazy wedding season.
Jane and James grew up in Bayonne, which is a peninsular city across the Hudson River from Battery Park and the southern tip of Manhattan. Bayonne’s residences reminded me of a cross between Queens and the Jersey Shore; the way that the homes were stacked upon one another but still retained that neighborhood charm. They got married at the church across from the elementary school they attended, and the walk from each of their homes provided literal walks down memory lane.
Both Jane and James built their wedding parties with friends from their childhoods, and the hours leading up to their ceremony felt like a Saturday in the neighborhood. I bounced from room-to-room as the groomsmen laughed and recounted stories, poking fun at each other in the way that only lifelong friends can. It really is magical the way that our brain remembers details about spaces, connecting intangible, invaluable memories with tactile experiences and objects. That morning felt like walkthrough a family scrapbook.
Jane and James’s roman catholic ceremony was followed by an intimate reception in Jersey City at Liberty House Restaurant. But before we headed there, we took some epic wedding party pictures at sunset in Liberty State Park with the Freedom Tower in the background. We also took advantage of a beautiful, historic transit hub where immigrants coming to the United States used to convene before making their way to Ellis Island to be processed. Jane and the bridesmaids deserve a shout out for braving the wintry wind off the Hudson, doing their best to stay warm in the middle of December with their fancy furs draped about their shoulders!
I remember meeting up with Jane and James in the summer when we did their engagement photos on the Jersey Shore, and they were set on getting married in 2020. They held true to their word and it was heartwarming to see how many of their closest family and friends showed up despite all that was going on. With all of the uncertainty it’s comforting to know that we all have people in our lives that we can rely on, laugh, and brave the storm with. From summer beaches to winter events on the water, New Jersey packs a lot more fun than New Yorkers and Long Islanders like myself give them credit for. I couldn’t think of a better way to wrap the wedding season than share a meal with Jane and James and their guests--I guess the pizza will have to wait until next year.
Enjoy these pics from Jame and Jane’s NJ Wedding:
vendors:
Dress | Maggie Sottero | Kleinfeld Bridal
Reception Venue | Liberty House Restaurant
Ceremony Location | St. Andrew the Apostle Church
Our last 2020 wedding was bittersweet…
…We LOVED getting to celebrate with Jane & James and kissing 2020 goodbye wasn’t exactly hard, but it was also our last wedding before officially becoming a family of three.
Welcome, Capa: The Home Birth Story of Our Son During the First Snow
Apollo Fields | Lifestyle Photography | Home Birth with Gaia Midwives | Northport, NY
Welcome, Capa: The Home Birth Story of Our Son During the First Snow of the Year
I watched the moonlit blizzard from my living room window, trying desperately to get a couple hours of sleep before the midwives arrived. My lungs felt shriveled and dry, unable to expand my chest with each breath. Just then a pair of headlights slowed to a stop in front of our house, illuminating the whirling snowfall in its high beams. As I walked upstairs to put on my ski jacket and pants, I told Heather as she came out of the darkened bathroom, “the midwives are here.”
That’s the first moment that it felt real. That Heather and I were about to have a baby. I met our first midwife, Ashley, halfway down the driveway as I shoveled out a pathway. As she went inside to tend to Heather in early labor, my chest became tighter and tighter with every load of snow I heaved into the street. I’d like to say that I was out in the cold clearing my mind but to be honest I was just doing what I had to.
I had to clear a path for the midwives, their assistants, and our doula to safely reach our front door. I had to sit on the floor, watching as Heather writhed in pain laying on blankets on the living room rug. I had to let her interlace her fingers on the back of my neck, clench and thrust my head into her collarbone when she went to stand during transition. I had to sit by her side as she screamed and pushed Capa out of her and into a warm pool on December 17 next to the Christmas tree.
The entire labor, front-to-back lasted around 24 hours. The early hours of the day were dark and uncertain, but once daylight emerged the comfort of a warm home in winter shone through the frosted windows. Our second midwife, Michele, arrived in the early morning, and we began to hash out a game plan as I fried a few eggs over toasted bagels. Over the next few hours I napped, Ashley left, and Michelle guided Heather through the ebbs and flows of her contractions.
Around 2 PM Michele did something I would never expect. She left. She knew that Heather was a couple hours away from transitioning and jokingly said, “the way he went in is the way he’s gonna come out,” on her way out the door. Then Heather and I just laid there. On blankets on the living room floor like we were camping in a tent. We stared at one other and just sank into the moment. We were right there, and all Heather’s body needed was a little push. And then we kissed.
The next couple hours things ratcheted up rather quickly. Heather requested the entirety of DAMN. by Kendrick Lamar to be played from front-to-back. And then told me to turn it up. Heather began to go inward, working through the layers of pain in her mind, reverberating them across various octaves with her vocal chords. She seemed to be going deeper and deeper into her thoughts with every contraction. Our doula, Nancy, could not have arrived at a better time. She began coaching me to comfort Heather as Michele gave the cue to begin filling the tub.
The last centimeter of dilation violently yanked Heather’s body and mind over and over again. I cried as I watched her suffering. I know how strong she is and that made it even worse. At the same time I could also hear a tinge of positivity—a purpose behind her every bellow and moan—like she knew that every ounce of her pain was productive.
When Heather made it to the tub, she ‘ooed’ her way into the warm water. She felt the weight of Capa lighten as she kneeled, settling her forearms onto the tub’s inflatable walls. I sat a couple of feet in front of her face, again, watching as she pushed through the pain. I admired the fact that she faced wave after wave and kept showing up to face the pain head on. I passed her glasses of water as she chugged them down and frequently replaced the cold towel she pressed against her forehead.
Right about then our friend and photographer, Cait, slinked in through the front door almost unnoticed. She rotated around the room, past Nancy, Michele, and her midwife assistant, Farah, adjusting settings as the shutter on her camera fluttered. I kept my eyes on Heather. Every scream seemed to increase in volume and intensity as Michele and Nancy coached her to exhale down through her pelvis. I sat watching, astonished at her strength. “You can break your own water if you want, Heather, it’s kind of in the way—but I will not do that unless you want me to,” Michele said softly. Heather then gathered a breath, reached down, broke her own effing water, and pushed Capa into the world.
The first look on her face was surprise, like she couldn’t believe she did it. She says she didn’t need to see his face, immediately pulling him up to her chest, because she knew what he looked like. She held him the way a child holds a pet when they’re upset, clenching them with an almost desperate love. Given all that we’ve been through, the first word that came to Heather’s mind when we later talked about her birth experience was—healing.
We waited 17 minutes before clamping the umbilical cord to make sure that Capa got all the nutrients he could from the placenta. I ceremoniously cut the cord and after a few minutes of cathartic reflection, Heather stood up, got wrapped in a towel, and casually walked upstairs (I was so caught in the moment that I didn’t realize how badass this was). We climbed into bed together, staring at Capa as I opened a beer in celebration. Michelle followed shortly after to look over Heather and stitched up a second-degree tear.
We cried as we took pictures, and Cait snapped a few before heading out. We laid there in silence as we heard Michele, Farah, and Nancy shuffling downstairs, cleaning and packing up. After a few last measurements, the midwives left and Nancy came up with some oatmeal and tea. With the wind whistling against the windows, we cuddled together, a warm family on a cold winter night.
Princeton University Engagement Photos
Apollo Fields | NJ Wedding Photographer | Princeton Wedding Photography | Princeton Engagement Photos | New Jersey Wedding Photographers
Jessica & Angelo
Every time I walk on an Ivy League university’s campus--I feel smarter. I think of the philosophy books I read during undergrad and I hear snippets of passages as little soundbytes in my head. The “collegiate gothic” architectural style of many prestigious institutions may have questionable origins, but if it doesn’t make you hear the voices of old white aristocrats then it probably conjures up the gruffly-spoken line: “You’re a wizard, Harry.” So when we met up with Jess and Angelo to take their engagement photos at Princeton University, it was no surprise that our conversation was filled with a beautiful mix of history and Hogwarts, of reminiscing and laughter.
Jess and Angelo told us a funny story about how both of their families would go to the same Christmas party when they were kids. One year Jess remembers playing with one of Angelo’s siblings but doesn’t remember Angelo being there at all. Angelo couldn’t recollect anything about where he was. We love hearing stories like these because it places our couples in a totally different context and time of their lives. Photographing Jess and Angelo’s engagement session was like we skipped to the middle of the book; but as we walked and talked it was like thumbing through their relationship’s first pages.
We got to talking about the plans for their wedding and how important it is for them to have a customizable space so they can really express who they are. We can’t emphasize enough how much we love to hear when our couples take the extra effort to curate an event that celebrates their relationship rather than what is easy (what about planning a wedding is easy?!) For us--it’s less about the minutiae and more about the moment. Embrace your wedding day because it’s truly one of the only days in your life when you can do whatever the hell you want!
Many call it the best day of our lives but we don’t believe that. We believe that our days and our stories carry us through many peaks and valleys and that our paths aren’t as linear as a mountain range at a distance. We prefer to see the days of our lives on the trail in the trees whose path eventually opens up to a big sky above the treeline. We prefer to get a little mud on our shoes, take a deep breath, and crack a beer when we reach the top. Your wedding day is but one peak of the whole mountain range.
We’re so lucky to be able to document the natural beauty of the stories that unfold before us. We get to be part of every one of our couple’s history, even if most of it is from behind the lens. Our jobs have taken us to mountains and oceans, inside mansions and cabins, and on strolls through “collegiate gothic” campuses. May we derive as much power from the jagged spires as we do from the spellbooks, for inside everyone of our minds and hearts are the magic things that make us us.
Celebrate Yourself With our 'Come As You Are' Sessions!!!
Apollo Fields redefines traditional boudoir shoots and prefers to call them ‘come as you are’ sessions. Here, are some good reasons to book these sessions!
Pre-bridal Boudoir Photoshoots have been popular for a long time. They surely make a great gift for your fiancé but it is just about that? I feel there is so much more to these photographs. They are a celebration of YOU. They are about embracing your form and figure and feeling confident in your own skin. They are about loving yourself and being simply you, being the way you are.
The Idea Behind “Come as you are” Sessions
When I began shooting weddings, naturally I began getting inquiries from my brides about boudoir sessions. I figured I could do it and said yes. Back then, I offered something that resembled a much more traditional approach. Something about the whole experience of the woman showing up at a hotel room with a bunch of lingerie, all nervous, drinking champagne, and doing these pics "for" their fiancé didn't sit right with me.
So I set out to change the script. I made it much more about form and figure and less about looking sexy for someone else. The sessions became a celebration of the person in front of me, exactly as they were, not trying to look like Victoria’s Secret model. Hence the name— “Come as you are” emerged in my mind for these sessions.
Eventually, I started hopping in front of the camera and posing myself to make my brides comfortable. I really learned to shed the awkwardness that we've been programmed to feel when it comes to nudity. I think my being comfortable in that way really helped my clients feel at ease when they got in front of the camera.
Reasons to Book “Come as You are” Sessions With Apollo Fields
I will give you five reasons here why you should consider a pre-wedding ‘Come as You Are’ session with us.
1. Empowerment
It might be a vulnerable thing to do but it’s empowering! Booking a session that is all about you is a really special gift for yourself that you’ll love decades later.
2. Confidence
This can be your way of building the confidence that you’ve been wanting to. This can be your opportunity to get bold. It can be a liberating experience for you that you might cherish forever.
P.S. I love watching people go from feeling timid in the beginning to being completely at home in their bodies.
3. Celebration of ‘YOU’
We all have insecurities. Those dissatisfactions can get the better of us when we start to obsess over them. Our ‘Come as You Are’ session can be just the thing to remind you that you are beautiful just as you are.
Above all, it can be a great way to celebrate yourself. To embrace your inner and outer beauty.
4. Amazing Solo Portraits
We all deserve to have individual portraits and not just stuff with significant others and family. By saying this, I don’t mean that you shouldn’t celebrate with family or it’s bad to be photographed with them but then you can have at least ONE solo session. You will love this, we promise!
5. ‘Me’ Time
You might have been planning your wedding tirelessly and need some time to yourself. So you can book this session and relax. Put on some make-up or flaunt a no make-up look. Feel comfortable in your own skin and take time to absorb all your emotions. We will capture the beauty that you are and you’ll get stunning photos of yourself soon thereafter.
You can take a look at our work on Instagram and our Facebook page. If you have any questions, contact me on 201.669.0149 or drop an email at heather@apollofields.com or Book us straightaway.
Holiday Album Sale 2020
Holiday Album Sale 2020 | Apollo Fields Wedding Albums | Lay Flat Leather Bound Archival Books
Apollo Fields Semi-Annual Album Sale
Staring at the reflection of the Tetons on Jenny Lake...watching as the clouds roll out of a valley in the Blue Ridge Mountains at sunset in North Carolina...those first moments when I paused the TV and Heather told me she was pregnant--these are the images that I will remember when I think about 2020.
Yet our brains have a funny habit of remembering the small awkward things we did during our childhood in vivid detail. It is much harder to remember all of the days that the sky was blue and everything went right. As Heather and I trudged our way through 2020 we set out to combat Covid and the political turmoil by creating as many positive memories as we could--doing our part to get some wins in a year that made some stretches of days feel like losing streaks.
It meant the world to us to be able to photograph your most intimate moments this year. Seeing each and every one of your smiling faces lifted us when it felt like there wasn’t that much to smile about. We were constantly reminded that we have a ton to be grateful for and despite everything that happened this year we still kicked ass and had fun while doing it. Heather and I hope that the memories we captured in 2020 make them that much easier to remember for you and your families.
Take advantage of our holiday album sale to remind yourselves or your relatives that 2020 wasn’t all bad. The albums are leatherbound and archival-quality so the prints are designed not to fade. They make amazing gifts and might just be exactly what your friends or family need!
Between now and midnight December 31, 2020 we will be selling ALL of our albums for 50% off!! Use promo code MAKEITMERRY at checkout to apply the discount.
Gantry Plaza Elopement in Long Island City
Apollo Fields | NYC Wedding Photographer | LIC Wedding Photography | Gantry Plaza Elopement | New York City Wedding Photographer
Dan & Alexis
We first met Alexis and Dan when Covid first hit in February. We met at an open, work-friendly cafe on the Upper East Side when hand sanitizer on every countertop was just becoming a thing. We sipped on some lattes and gameplanned their intimate ceremony at Gantry Plaza in Long Island City and the reception to follow at a bier garten in Astoria. As you might expect, the reception will have to wait until 2021 but Alexis and Dan still popped some champagne with a few family and friends on a gorgeous Saturday in November.
A light fall breeze accompanied by the warmth of unimpeded sunshine created a whimsicality to the afternoon. Alexis and Dan picked a shaded spot beneath a tree for a ceremony site and joggers and picnickers congratulated them in passing or at a distance. A slip-up or two in their vows and a maintenance truck added humor and levity to those precious moments; I think a ceremony for them sans silliness or laughter would be out of place. They are both such joyous souls.
Upon the conclusion of the ceremony, Alexis and Dan busted out some park-friendly personal 375ml bottles of Moët with some of the best desserts we’ve ever had. The ‘cake jars’ as they are called were from a local Astoria bakery, Cakes by Nerwan, and they blew us away with their lightness and flavor. Who needs hor d'oeuvres when you can have dessert first? Alexis and Dan 100% knew what they were doing.
From there we waited for some shifting cloud cover to get some family formals to commemorate the day. With the skyline of Manhattan in the background, this intimate ceremony turned epic pretty quick. I had no idea the view from Long Island City was so beautiful. We then borrowed Alexis and Dan to snap a few shots of just the two of them up and down Gantry Plaza. When it comes to hosting a wedding, Alexis and Dan showed that if you host it, the vibes will come.
It’s wild to think about the places we were in those short pre-Covid 2020 days and even crazier to think about all we’ve endured since then. Sandwiched between the unpredictable events were the couples like Alexis and Dan who planned an epic day to celebrate their marriage. Most rescheduled, others pared down plans, and some cancelled altogether. Heather and I are honestly so grateful that Alexis and Dan and many others chose to host something this year because it delivered us so much joy. People like to poke fun at “smiling with your eyes” when you’re wearing a mask but Heather and I took in all the happiness that we could.
When I look back on 2020 I will remember how trying it all was, how I experienced anxiety for the first time, and how we managed to work while Heather was pregnant with our first child; but perhaps most importantly, I will remember the moments of levity, the slip-ups doing vows, and all of the maintenance truck moments that kept us smiling with our eyes behind the mask behind the lens.
Enjoy these pics from Alexis & Dan’s Long Island City Wedding:
The Home Stretch– Reflections on These Last Few Weeks of Pregnancy
The Home Stretch– Reflections on These Last Few Weeks of Pregnancy | Third Trimester Pregnant Blog | Apollo Fields Wedding Photography
The Home Stretch
I didn’t realize what a mindf*** being 37+ weeks pregnant would be…
It’s kind of like this: I wake up in the morning and think to myself, ‘I could have a baby today’. I also think to myself, ‘It also could be another 4 or 5 weeks before we have this baby’. For someone who prefers structure and control, that’s a lot of variability.
On the other hand, I do feel grateful to technically have made it to “term” at all, considering that at 32 weeks we had a very legitimate scare when my body started showing signs of potential preterm labor and we had our first taste of things-could-go-wrong this pregnancy. Luckily, after a solid step back from working full-throttle and some much needed TLC, literally all of those physical symptoms reversed themselves (bodies are crazy).
So I am–pregnant AF– and waffling between still loving it and being over the whole thing. I had a good run of feeling pretty invincible and healthier than I have ever been, but this home stretch is REAL. By the time the sun goes down, which unfortunately is super early these days, I’m getting pretty crippled. My lower back tightens up, the baby begins assaulting my organs, occasionally getting a foot hooked under a rib, and no amount of cat-cows seem to do the trick anymore.
If I drop something and I can’t pick it up with my toes, it stays there. I now use the old lady bar to get my ass out of the bathtub. No-shave-November applied for most of my body. December doesn’t seem to be an exception. I have like four pieces of clothing that still fit me and two of them belong to my husband. In a nutshell, I’m not cute. But then I step back and also realize that this is probably the most beautiful I’ll ever be. I told you it’s a mindf***.
Terrence is good at grounding me even through the most sophisticated mind/body tricks that I can play on myself. “None of this was a guarantee” has become a bit of a mantra in our house, and that’s a pretty sobering reality, even for someone who has been sober for the last nine months. He’s right though, it was only two years ago that we were in the midst of the ectopic pregnancy and having all-too-real conversations with our doctors about how complicated it might be to have a future healthy pregnancy.
When I ruptured two Decembers ago, I didn’t just lose the baby but I also lost one of my tubes and a lot of blood. I gained a mess of scar tissue and was left with a lot of “time will tell” answers. We couldn’t have known it at the time, but I would end up getting pregnant again from the tubeless side (remember when I said bodies are crazy!?) which is crazy. My dominant ovary is my right one, and miraculously my left tube was able to haul over to the other side, scoop up an egg, and drop it off in the right place. Mind blowing, right??
Now, here we are, in the thick of this mess that is 2020, and also in one of the most beautiful seasons of our lives. The days are slower than they have been in a long time, and while I busybody myself with organizing our drawers and turning our freezer into a soup kitchen, we have also been able to spend guilt-free evenings tucked up on the couch together just savoring the fact that we’re in this space together.
Sometimes timing is perfect and tonight my dear friend Lindsey just sent me an article on this time of “Zwichen”, the in-between dimension of existence that is late pregnancy. Putting a name to this transition period is surprisingly helpful, and quells a lot of the questioning about whether other women feel the same push-pull of living within two worlds at once.
Everything feels like a contradiction and I’m learning to be okay with that. Falling asleep last night, I was staring at the mound that is my belly thinking how foreign my body looks and feels, and yet being more at home in myself than I ever have. How does that make sense? “Pay attention to that feeling”, Lindsey told me, assuring me of the role this feeling plays in labor.
There’s a heaviness and a lightness to these days. A sense of anticipation and peace at the same time. Wanting to work and be still run our biz like a boss but also wanting to nest and be home and hunkered down. Trusting in the journey but also wondering WTF is going to happen. So much that feels contradictory but necessary. It is hard to label what this transitory time truly feels like, so I’ll just still to “Zwichen” and leave the rest to the cosmos.
Photography: Mostly cell pics with a few gems by Lindsey Eden &. Lauren Wright
Wedding Photos in Grand Teton National Park & Yellowstone
Apollo Fields | Grand Teton Wedding Photographer | Yellowstone Wedding Photographer | National Park Weddings | Mountain Wedding photographer | Jackson wedding Photography | Jackson Wedding Photographers
“I’ll never forget this moment,” Heather said during our two-year wedding anniversary picnic at Jenny Lake in Grand Teton National Park. A beautiful orange fox had just scampered by as the mountain water moved with a predictable calmness. It’s hard to believe that just a couple of months ago we weren’t sure if we were going to be shooting any weddings this season—yet there we were—taking the time to find the balance on a work trip in one of the most beautiful places on the planet. We have Sam and Conor to thank for that.
Sam and Conor originally planned to have their wedding at Grand Lake in the Rockies in Colorado, but wound up pivoting to an elopement in Grand Teton/Yellowstone National Park in Wyoming. As soon as Heather and I deduced that we could come, they sent us one of their favorite books, American Wolf, to get us pumped up about the trip. The book is a beautiful narrative about finding the balance between society and the reintroduction of wolves into Yellowstone National Park in 1995. I can’t stop talking about it.
We began Sam and Conor’s photos at Schwabacher Landing at sunrise as Sam and Conor braved the morning chill for a few unforgettable photo opportunities. We hit Mormon Row next, and circled around to Jenny Lake to round out the Grand Teton experience. The entire shoot took several hours between the driving and stopping and I couldn’t think of a better argument/analogy for the phrase “life is about the journey, not the destination,” than driving through Grand Teton and Yellowstone National Parks.
The next day we grabbed breakfast and trekked up to Yellowstone, stopping at Ol’ Faithful, Grand Prismatic, and a few other spots to watch for moose, bears, bison, and wolves. Conor and I split off on a couple of the short walks and we talked about his love for fly fishing. I had no idea how much science and geographic knowledge went into the sport, nor did I know that the flys that they use as bait are actually fake (I always wondered how you put the hook throw a dead fly’s brittle wing or body). It was clear that Sam and Conor loved to get lost in the calm of a stream or creek, entirely content to disconnect and focus on the task at hand.
A couple years back, Sam and Conor decided to take an indefinite recess from social media. They found that their habits were throwing them off balance. At red lights they’d find themselves reaching for their phones even though there was nothing they needed to follow up on. As I get older the the phrase “finding a balance” seems to ring more and more true. I’ve found my personal attachment to my phone increase during quarantine and was happy to hear Sam and Conor speak about their intentional disconnection from the common and troublesome habit.
Whether it is reintroducing wolves in Yellowstone, throwing on some waders and wading into a stream, managing our relationship to social media, or remembering to have a picnic on a work trip—it is hard to deny the importance of balance in our lives. Heather and I are lucky to have a business that brings us to places that remind us of that, and thanks to couples like Sam and Conor, we will continue to create and capture moments that we will never forget.
Enjoy these photos from Conor & Sam’s Grand Teton & Yellowstone adventure:
Target Rock Family Session in Lloyd Harbor
Target Rock Family Session in Lloyd Harbor | Long Island Photography | Apollo Fields Family Photos
Here's to 30 and Quite Possibly The Best Days of My Life
30th Birthday Reflections | Third Trimester Pregnancy Blog | Long Island Wedding Photographers | Apollo Fields Photography
Here's to 30 and Quite Possibly The Best Days of My Life
I remember waking up on the morning of Terrence’s 30th birthday in a cabin we had rented on top of a mountain in Colorado. He had woken up before me, and I went downstairs to find him sitting in a bay window, writing and drinking coffee. He wrote a blog appropriately titled, “Turning 30– Am I Where I Expected Myself To Be?” and now that I am turning 30, I find myself asking the same question.
Of course, my 30th birthday looks a little different than Terrence’s did a few years ago. We celebrated his birthday by venturing out into the mountains, spending the day with a few friends, going to some breweries, and then driving up to a trailhead in the middle of the night to hike to our cabin. We were guided by nothing more than our cell phone flashlights and good morale, but having the time of our lives.
When I look back on pictures from then, I can’t help but think that we look like such babies. We were engaged and planning our own wedding, living in Colorado, still figuring out each other’s place in Apollo Fields, and so full of adventure. We could have never predicted how the next few years would turn out: the ups and downs of moving back East, getting married, going through an ectopic pregnancy, traveling the country for weddings, running a small business during a pandemic, and eventually getting pregnant again.
But here we are – in a totally different season of life – and yet just as happy and optimistic as ever. We don’t look at things with the same carefree lens as we might have a few years ago, but we’re not jaded either. We have a little babe who will be here in just a few weeks, and even as I sit here typing this out on my couch I can’t help but think that each squirmy little kick is a surreal reminder that shit’s about to get real real.
So, as Terrence hashed out on his birthday, “am I where I expected myself to be” turning 30? Literally speaking, probably not; but figuratively speaking I think I am. I don’t think I would have imagined myself in a suburban Long Island home per se, but just about everything else adds up. I love that we are able to sustain ourselves with a business built on creativity and authentic connection, and the fact that I am able to do it with my husband is beyond fulfilling.
I feel a sense of pride for our marriage, for it is built on the pillars of open and honest communication but also contains a massive amount of silliness and zest for life. I love our animals and the quirky little adventures that we all take and I can’t wait to bring this little baby into the mix.
I will admit that I love this age for the gift to curate our circle of truest friends. There is something freeing about understanding who is an acquaintance and who is a lifelong friend, and to not carry any guilt around that distinction is a wonderful part of adulthood that just doesn’t seem to exist in your early 20s.
My relationship to family has evolved as well. Of course, building a family of your own will put you on the fast track to developing that understanding, but I think this chapter of life has also been so conducive to realizing the role that family can play in your life if you nurture it. Quarantine has brought a lot of us closer, especially Terrence’s siblings (all six of them!), and I feel especially grateful to have been able to bond more with both sides of our families during this year.
I think many of us experienced a collective sense of both connection and loneliness during this pandemic, and as I look ahead to the winter and what postpartum life might resemble, I anticipate a lot of those same emotions coming up. I’m not sure what the next few weeks, months, or years will look like, but I am looking forward to them.
I think turning 30 can bring on a crisis of ‘I haven’t done enough with my life so far’ for a lot of people, and while my default is normally to shortchange my own accomplishments, I think I’ll shift that mode of thinking into feeling a sense of calm-- not for the things I have necessarily worked for or earned, but for the gifts of stability and connection that I have from the people around me.
Cheers,
Heather
Photography: Cait McCarthy Photo
Peach Creek Ranch Wedding in College Station, TX
Apollo Fields | Barn Wedding Photographer | College Station Wedding Photographer | Peach Creek Ranch Wedding Photos
I had never been to Texas before. I had never seen the long, open highways, oversized gas stations, and wrought iron gateways to large acreage ranches. I had never seen so many mud-splattered pickup trucks. I had never felt the famous Texas hospitality up close. For a wedding that was supposed to be in Montauk on the eastern tip of Long Island I wasn’t sure what to expect from a barn wedding venue in Texas but boy am I glad that I went.
Bri and Tyler got married at Peach Creek Ranch, an incredibly well run, beautifully manicured and executed venue just outside of College Station, TX. It’s expansive property boasts a cottage for each the bride and the groom, a 5,000 square-foot barn, a picturesque lake with a winding path, and a pristine, intimate ceremony site. It seems that every detail is planned out and accounted for and it made photographing there a breeze. It certainly helps that Bri made some excellent choices for catering, rentals, and other vendors!
Bri and Heather actually grew up riding horses together so it was a no-brainer to do Bri and Tyler’s engagement photos on her family farm in Montauk. But the questions of where to get married and where to live were much more difficult for Bri and Tyler, who each feel a deep connection to where they are from. Tyler is from Texas and his family has a large hunting property of their own. But between some unforeseen circumstances surrounding their original venue in Montauk and the advent of Covid-19, the Lone Star State became the site of their wedding.
The morning of their wedding, Tyler and I spoke about how weddings in Texas are typically casual affairs with barbecue and kegs of beer. He explained that guest counts are highly variable and some guests even bring coolers full of beer as backup. It reminded me of how Heather and I celebrated our wedding, treating it as one big dinner party rather than an extravagant affair. But the way Bri and Tyler met in the middle at Peach Creek Ranch, where they served some of the best surf and turf I’ve ever had, and allowed their guests to enjoy a two-hour cocktail hour made me appreciate all the decisions they made to make their day represent who they are.
Bri and Tyler’s wedding being in Texas was the most appropriate conclusion to a wedding season that was literally all over the map. They did it big but kept it meaningful, opting to press forward to celebrate their love rather than postpone it. They kept things that each of them found important to their wedding day but didn’t sacrifice too much. They made a lot of difficult decisions together and waded through some of the most difficult waters of their lives. They say that everything is bigger in Texas--and after seeing these two get married there and capturing the way that Tyler looked at Bri come down the aisle--it’s safe to say you can add love to the list.
Enjoy these photos from Bri & Tyler’s Peach Creek Wedding:
vendors:
Photography & Writing | Apollo Fields
Dress | Sottero and Midgley | Kleinfeld Bridal
Venue | Peach Creek Ranch | College Station, TX
Videography | Reverent Wedding Films
Planner | Uniquely Set
DJ/Band | Royal Dukes
Florist | Willow Lane
Rings | Diamonds Direct
Invitations/Save the Dates | Minted
Suit | Men’s Wearhouse
Hair and Makeup | Tease HTX
Transportation | Shofur
Pikes Peak Proposal in Colorado Springs
Pikes Peak Proposal in Colorado Springs | CO Engagement Photography | Apollo Fields Wedding Photographers
Photography: Dylan Gallagher for Apollo Fields
Long Island Wedding Photography
Long Island Wedding Photography | North Fork Wedding Photographers | Apollo Fields
Meredith & Vince
Sunrise Elopement Vow Exchange at Brooklyn Bridge
Apollo Fields | Brooklyn Bridge Engagement | Sunrise Brooklyn Bridge Photos | Wedding Photos Brooklyn Bridge | Brooklyn Bridge park, NY
It’s funny how the arches of Brooklyn Bridge, in all of their man-made glory, reminded me of the natural beauty of the Grand Tetons at sunrise. I’ve really learned to love the quiet of early mornings, especially in places like New York City that are known for their cacophony of sounds. When we met up with Vanessa and Jake to photograph them as they shared their vows that October morning, there were plenty of cars whizzing by below us but none were blaring their horns. The only sounds we heard were the heavy breaths of bikers passing by and their bells ringing in the distance.
Vanessa and Jake are one of those couples that claim that they don't know what to do in front of the camera then proceed to dance and play like they are the stars of a rom-com. I’m trying to find a word more accurate than ‘chemistry’ that captures this--the way that two people interact when they are so obviously in love. I think it’s part being comfortable with PDA and part being comfortable with yourself; and we could tell very quickly that Vanessa and Jake had it whatever it is.
Vanessa and Jake picked the Brooklyn Bridge to have a vow sharing/first date anniversary because that’s where Jake proposed. They playfully recreated the moment on the spot where it happened while popping a bottle of champagne! It seems that in every proposal story the person who is proposing is always uncharacteristically failing at trying to be sly to get their partner to the spot they want to propose and we think it’s hilarious. I mean there’s no smooth way to be like, ‘let’s walk to this super picturesque spot and just take in the good vibes’ without it sounding super forced. Everyone knows that those fleeting moments are so great precisely because they aren’t scripted. Here’s one for all the romantics out there like Jake and I who try no matter what.
From there we trekked to both their old and new neighborhoods in Bed Stuy and got some shots of them at other landmarks of their relationship. We love taking a trip down memory lane with our couples, it gives us a chance to really get to know them. Jake and Vanessa even took a silly photo in front of a token NYC Chinese food restaurant because Jake has an affinity for those hole-in-the-wall joints--and who can blame him, boneless spare ribs are effing delicious.
Spending that morning with Vanessa and Jake really solidified why I love New York as much as I love the mountains. We just walked and told stories and watched as the city came alive (I was totally blown away by how many people go for a run at sunrise). Heather goes on and on about the beautiful alpen glow of the morning and the golden hour at night and I hate to admit that I’m beginning to enjoy chasing the light with her. Whether it is on mountain peaks, city streets, or a fluorescent light behind a Chinese restaurant sign, to the light we go.
Enjoy these images from Vanessa & Jake’s sunrise ceremony:
Photography: Apollo Fields
New England Autumn Engagement Session
New England Autumn Engagement Session | Connecticut Foliage Engagement Photography | Apollo Fields Wedding Photographers
Jacki & Tim
Timing the New England foliage is never a perfect science– anyone who has tried to chase the leaves knows that all it takes is one nasty frost or snowfall and the whole landscape can get nipped overnight. So trying to schedule engagement sessions around the leaves during busy season can be especially tricky. However, with Jacki and Tim’s session, I think we nailed it (part luck, part good timing— true for most good things in life right?)
We met up in Washington CT (fun fact, the same town that “Stars Hollow” was based on in Gilmore Girls) on a beautiful Sunday and thought that this cozy, quiet little town would be all ours. We were in for a bit of a shock when we realized that the leaf peepers had taken over and pretty much every restaurant was booked except for one, which boasted a whole lot of motorcycles out front and a pretty good burger. We had a great lunch and caught up about all things wedding planning, quarantine life, and of course horses.
The horse world happens to be the common denominator between Jacki and I. Many of you guys might know how much of a role riding has played in my life (I have been riding since I started walking) and I actually went to boarding school in CT for four years to compete on the riding circuit. Jacki and I know each other from that past life, and we both are lucky to still be riding and own our own horses. So naturally, it only took us about five minutes to start chatting about that world and her sweet fiancé, Tim, was happy to let us go on and on about horses.
Terrence has less of a bandwidth for the pony-talk and certainly does not want to spend his weekends at the shows, so Tim got major brownie points from me for being such an enthusiastic horse-hubby! After lunch we went over to Hidden Valley Preserve to shoot and got so lucky to have an amazing golden hour against the beautiful New England foliage!
Enjoy Tim & Jacki’s beautiful autumn engagement photos:
Location: Hidden Valley Preserve, Washington Depot CT
Photography: Apollo Fields
Long Island City Elopement Photography
Long Island City Elopement Photography | Apollo Fields Wedding Photographers | NYC Weddings 2020
Lauren & Jayram
Vanderbilt Museum and Planetarium Intimate Wedding
Vanderbilt Museum and Planetarium Intimate Wedding | Centerport, New York Weddings | Long Island Microwedding Photography | Apollo Fields Wedding Photographers
Meghan & Samuel
Like many other industries, photographing fellow wedding industry pros can go one way or another— either it is a total dream or the experience backfires and you end up with a micromanaging know-it-tall. Luckily for me, Meghan and Sam’s wedding was the former!! It was exactly that: a total dream!
This sweet couple unfortunately had their original wedding plans totally derailed by COVID but still wanted to honor their love by getting married this year. The plan was to postpone the big wedding to 2021, but as the year continued on, they ultimately decided that this wedding would be the wedding— and honestly, I can relate so hard to this! Planning any wedding celebration is a lot of moving parts even in non-pandemic times, and I cannot imagine how tough it must be to have everything turned upside down and then trying to reconfigure multiple weddings.
At the end of the day, the most important part of a wedding– whether it is just two people or two hundred people–is the love between the couple and their commitment to one another. Meghan summed it up best when she said, “ I work in the wedding industry and love attention to details” she started, “But for myself, I would say to ignore any pressures to deliver anything perfect! If there is anything that 2020 has taught us, it is the importance of family and health and spending it with the ones you love most”.
That is exactly how their wedding felt, too! Meghan and Samuel exchanged their vows in front of six guests at the Vanderbilt Museum and Planetarium in Centerport, NY. The venue is stunning and sits right up against the water. We were lucky to have a perfect autumn morning and were able to have the ceremony at the fountain in the back of the courtyard. Their ceremony was personalized and so sentimental, and I think that because it was so intimate, their promises were that much more special.
After they exchanged the vows, rings, and “I do’s”, Meghan and Sam had their first dance in the courtyard followed by parent dances. You could just feel how light and easy the day was flowing without all the chaos of hundreds of guests and tight timelines to stick to, and I admit that it makes a big difference as a photographer, too, to be able to lean into my creativity instead of worrying about huge shot lists and complicated moving parts.
We were able to do family photos without needing a party planner, an ambassador, and an assistant all coordinating people and then I was able to steal the couple for some romantics of just the two of them without having to rush them back to cocktail hour in five minutes. Such a luxury! We wrapped up the morning with a sweet cake cutting and a quick toast before heading out and I left the venue just beaming with happiness for this amazing couple!
Enjoy these sneaks from Meghan & Samuel’s intimate wedding:
Vendors:
Photography: Apollo Fields
Venue: The Vanderbilt Museum
Rentals: Elite Party Rentals
HMUA: Hair Salon of Centerport / Genna Makeup
Florals: Cold Spring Harbor Flowers
Officiant: Michele LaRosa- LI Officiant
Videography: Purroy Video
Dress: BHLDN
Bakery: Blondies Bake Shop
Standley Lake Family Photos in Arvada CO
Standley Lake Family Photos in Arvada, CO | Apollo Fields Autumn Photography | Colorado Family Photographer
Amy & Jackson’s Family
One of my favorite things about our jobs (and I know I’ve said this before) is that the relationships we create with our couples go far beyond their wedding days. Amy and Jackson got married a few years ago in Colorado and I was lucky enough to document their sweet day. Each year since then, we catch up for their family photos, and it is such a treat to document them and their boys!
No matter what stage their family is in (we’ve done maternity pics, newborns, etc), these guys never take a bad photo! It certainly makes my job easy, but it also helps that their two little ones are SO sweet and curious. Watching them grow up in front of the camera is such a privilege, and I can’t wait to keep on shooting them throughout the years to come.
This session took place at Standley Lake in Arvada, which is one of my personal favorite places to shoot and just hang out for some time in nature. I first stumbled upon this location in 2016 when I was looking for a house for Terrence and I to rent when we moved there. It was how I discovered the suburb of Arvada, and the spot has never failed to impress since then!
The only change since then that I noticed when I went back this year was a big ugly condo complex that’s getting built right into the Mountain View… ugh. I suppose it was inevitable, but I just hope that this location is protected in the years to come because it is such a special retreat for Coloradans who might not have time to get all the way out into the mountains but still want a scenic break by the lake!
Enjoy these family photos from Standley Lake:
Photography: Apollo Fields
Are you wanting to get your holiday photos for 2020 done before it’s too cold or too late? NOW is the time! Reach out to get on the calendar asap.
Mountain Elopement in Boulder CO
Apollo Fields | Lost Gulch Wedding Photography | Boulder Wedding Photographer | Boulder Colorado Weddings | Best Boulder Wedding Photos | Colorado Wedding Ideas
Logan & RJ
Driving by the Flatirons of Chautauqua Park in Boulder, Colorado, will always remind me of one of the first weddings Heather and I photographed as Apollo Fields. I remember being so nervous that I was going to miss a shot or drop a piece of equipment; I remember watching in admiration as Heather wrangled people from their drinks for family formals—but perhaps most importantly—I remember the couple. They taught me the invaluable lesson that the better you know your couple the better you will be at telling their story. So as the Flatirons moved from our periphery into the rear view, we headed up to Flagstaff Mountain and I kept getting more and more excited to begin to tell the story of Logan and RJ.
Logan and RJ decided to elope at Lost Gulch because their original wedding plans were spoiled by the pandemic. Their intimate ceremony was attended by their closest friends and family and streamed online. Unfortunately, RJ’s sisters and mother couldn’t attend the event, so Logan went out of her way to invite two of RJ’s best friends to surprise him and still make it feel special. They plan to host a full wedding in Fall 2021 at the house they will be buying in the next few months!
Logan and RJ’s first date involved a Phish Stream and a bunch of beers—and that sounds pretty awesome (Heather and I subbed Phish for an ice hockey game in Central Park for ours). We’re all about keeping it simple; it actually has been one of the silver linings of the weddings of 2020. It has loosened the formalities of what can or should be done at weddings and invited a whole slew of thoughtful creativity. For instance, Logan decided to rock a pair of badass boots and white stunner shades and we were all about it! If you’re not doing what you wanna do when it comes to your wedding then what are you doing?!
Logan and RJ will be sharing their vows at their celebration next year and we’re encouraging everyone to do what feels right for them! It’s another angle of the silver lining of this year: you get to cut out the parts out of weddings that you don’t like and no relative or friend can say a damn thing about it! We do think it is important to anchor each celebration with something intentional; whether it is sharing your vows, a vow renewal, or a full ceremony, the more feelings the better.
As we descended the switch backs of Flagstaff Mountain we stopped in pull-offs to take a few more impromptu shots of Logan and RJ along the way. They ran through the brush, jumped into each other’s arms, and allowed one another to be happy. It’s a feeling that has been hard to come by this year, as it seems like every other day we have some other problem that is heaped upon our shoulders—but it is up to us to unplug—throw on some kick ass boots and stunner shades, and step into the sunshine.
Enjoy these photos from Logan & RJ’s wedding celebration:
As seen in: Mountainside Bride
